gratitude

Philippians 4:6 says "do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God," and 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says "give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."

I've been thinking a lot about gratitude lately.   Sometimes I've been thinking about it because recently there's been times I've been overwhelmed with gratitude to the point of tears, and other times I'm thinking about it because I'm I'm feeling so incredibly ungrateful, maybe also to the point of tears, and wondering why.  Maybe it's not just me that gets these crazy swings in emotion/ways of thinking.  Or maybe it is just me, and I might need to get some professional help with this (if this is the case, please let me know as soon as possible).

One of the reasons I've been thinking about gratitude is because I am so incredibly grateful to several of the churches here in Hiroshima who have gone out of their way to fill my apartment with second-hand furniture, kitchen appliances, kitchenware, washing machine... basically everything I need to "live" here.  I'm more and more realising that true 'indepedence' is a myth - it doesn't exist.  No matter how independent we think we are, we're not.  We're all relient on provision from sources outside ourselves in some way or another, no matter how much it may look like we're standing on our own two feet.  And ultimately we're relient on God's provision through people, through circumstance, through where we were born into society... whether we were even born to start with... whether we will even live to see tomorrow...everything.  Acts 17:25 says "he himself gives everyone life and breath and everything else." Waiting for two months for my out-of-sync moving costs, new living expenses, and salary change to line up, I've been humbled to realise that if it wasn't for the generosity of the church in Hiroshima, I wouldn't be making it through these first two months here.  Let alone the ones after that probably.  I don't know what I would have done otherwise?  Literally, ministry amongst the homeless?  Could have been fun actually, now I think about it... in Sendai I met this guy briefly who was a homeless gambling addict and he met Jesus and his life has completely turned around.  Yes, promo for the Teen Challenge Japan Ministry - check it out!


But what I've found is that I'm really good at being grateful when cirucmstances go my way, and not so good at it when they don't.  All too quickly I find myself sulking about this and that, often the day straight after had I cried with gratitude as someone gave me a washing machine, and someone else carried it up five flights of stairs to my apartment for me.  Yes I live on the fifth floor with no elevator.  Some of the pastors think it's funny.  Some people don't (normally these are the people who carried my stuff up those stairs).  


So when I get like that, I get frustrated, knowing that we are called to be grateful in all circumstances.  I think I am growing in this slowly, but it is definitely still a challenge.  Anyway, today I read something that completely blew my mind on this topic and I wanted to share it with you guys.  It's my most recent assignment for work - translating the testimony of a Christian survivor of the Atomic Bomb dropped on Hiroshima on August 6th 1945. Her name is Meiko Kurihara, she was 19 at the time. 


In the first pages she writes of walking through the burning town, looking for the ruins of her home, and trying to find her father.  She writes about walking seeing the frames of burnt-out trains, and the charcoal bodies of its passangers still standing, sitting, or fallen over, shrivelled up like black shrimps.  She writes about walking along the rivers and how they were so full of bodies you couldn't see the water, because everyone must have leapt in their to escape the fire or have been blown there by the nuclear wind.


She writes about looking for her dad in the ruined hospital grounds, and walking past all the burnt, injured, and dying people whispering 'water, water.'


And then she writes about how she bumped into a friend, and when she did, she remembered the verse in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that says "and God is faithful; he will not let you (face trials) beyond what you can bear. But when you (face trials) he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."

What?!?!  She could thank God for "not letting her face trials beyond what she could bear" in the middle of a nuclear wasteland?

I mean, we use that verse to talk about "oh, this really difficult exam that you can't be bothered studying for, don't worry, God will help you, because he never puts you through things you can't handle..."  


Then she goes on to talk about how as a result she went on to be baptised, beleiving that God had given her a second chance at life, and a calling to continue to serve him.  She was baptised again in 1946, having lost her house, her family's wealth, family members... and spending her days collecting driftwood from the seashore to make into things to sell for a living, while drastically weakened and suffering from radiation.  

And she was grateful to God for being alive and went and got baptised.


Seriously, the disconnect between her experience and ours today (definitely myself included) is ridiculous.  Here I am thinking "oh poor me, we don't have an office yet, so I have to work from home and oh, I struggle so much to wake up in the mornings."  Seriously... what is my problem?


Anyway, reading this testimony just really challenged my understanding of "gratitude" and I guess also of "provision."  Really, how selfish-centered are we these days?  Could many from our generation go through what she did and thank God for just being alive?  Maybe some of us could - this reminds me of some testimonies I heard in Sendai from those who suffered the Tsunami disaster last year.  However, I think a lot of us couldn't do it.  Me included, I think many of us today have to have circumstances to our liking in order to truly thank God.  And how ridiculous are our standards for "circumstances to our liking" - is it not enough to just be alive?  Not these days... gotta be alive, with a nice house, with my washing machine, with my iphone... would be better of course if I had an ipad as well, but oh, can't have everything...


Anyway, just wanted to share with you guys how much this intense testimony blew my mind. 


We're looking at doing an interview with this lady at some point, what a precious testimony, and what a challenge to the younger generation today as to what true 'gratitude' really is.  We're looking at 'true peace' as a theme for the Hiroshima Festival in November next year, and her testimony contains a completely counter-cultural, mind-blowing concept of peace... gratitude... contentment... that so many have never experienced, and could probably not even imagine. 


The verse I started with, Philippians 4:6, then goes on to tell us that such gratitude is deeply connected with the true peace we have through Jesus - 4:7 says "and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Hmm.  A lot to think about.